There was a prudent man who brushed his teeth twice a day, wore rubbers in wet weather, did his daily dozen, slept with windows open, was careful with his diet, had a medical examination twice a year, never smoked, drank or indulged in any kind of excess. He was set to live to be one hundred years old.

The funeral was held last Wednesday. He is survived by eighteen specialists, four health institutes, six gymnasiums and numerous manufacturers of health food and antiseptics.

He forgot to look out for a train at a crossing.