Some Children’s Church Humor

A Sunday School Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child’s work.

Child_Drawing_GodAs she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The precocious little girl replied, “I’m drawing God.”

The teacher paused just a moment and then said, “But no one knows what God looks like.”

Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the young girl replied, “They will in a minute.”

A Sunday school teacher had been discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.

After explaining the commandment to “honor” thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, “Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?”

One little boy’s hand shot up before anyone else could speak, (the oldest of a family) and he answered with a big grin, “Thou shall not kill.”

One Sunday morning a little girl was sitting and watching while her mother while teaching the Sunday School class. The little girl suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast to her brunette hair color.

She looked at her mother, raised her hand and when acknowledged inquisitively asked, “Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?”

Her mother replied, “Well, every time that a little boy or girl does something wrong and makes their mother cry or makes them unhappy, one of a mother’s hairs turns white.”

The little girl thought about this revelation for a moment and then said in the midst of the class, “Momma, how come ALL of grandma’s hairs are white?”

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Church sponsored elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. One of the teachers watching over the cafeteria had made a note, and posted it on the apple tray; “Take only ONE. God is watching.”
As the children moved further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. Evidently one of the children had written a note and placed it next to the plate of cookies; “Take all you want. God is watching the apples.”

The little girl came home from her first day of Kindergarten at the church sponsored charter school. As her mother noticed the frown on the child’s face, she asked her daughter how her first day of school was.

The little girl blurted out nearly in tears, “I’m just wasting my time,” she stated to her mom, “I can’t read, I can’t write – AND they won’t let me talk!”

And finally;

biblewithleafA little boy opened the big family bible sitting on their front room coffee table. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages, trying to fathom the scribbles of notes and underlines in the margin. Suddenly, something fell out from between the pages of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it in disbelief and fascination. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages.

“Mama, look what I found”, the boy called out.

“What have you got there, dear?” the mother questioned.

With astonishment in the young boy’s voice, he innocently answered, “I think it’s Adam’s underwear!”

Have a merry AND Glorious day!! Remember, “This IS the day the LORD has made; Let us rejoice and be glad in it.” — Psalm 118:24 (paraphrased).

About Roland Ledoux

Pastor of Oasis Bible Ministry, an outreach ministry of intercessory prayer, encouragement and exhortation of the Word of God and author of the ministry blog, For The Love of God. I live in Delta, Colorado with my beautiful wife of 47+ years and a young yellow lab whom we affectionately call Bella.
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